You probably know this already. I ride a motorcycle–a Harley to be exact. As I surf the net I come across many blogs and sites for and about people who enjoy the open road in a non-cage vehicle. There is a great deal of debate as to what to call us. Am I a biker? Am I a rider? Am I a motorcycle enthusiast? Frankly, I will leave that debate to the experts. I can say for certain that I love the feel of the wind in my face and the sights, smells and sensations while I am on my Harley. Others who ride will tell you the same thing.
I saw this list recently, and got a few chuckles. Other riders out there will appreciate them too. Non-rides will get a glimpse into our world! As you may know, I have not been riding long, but these make perfect sense to me! Hope you enjoy them as much as I did. Remember, motorcycle are on the road too. Due to their size, they are not always as visible as a car. They still deserve the same respect afforded cars. Give them space!
(These are reprinted and edited from the July 2011 issue of Rider Magazine, “There’s a Name for That.”)
- BRO DEPENDENCY: Doing what your riding buddies do just because they’re doing it. When riders stop thinking for themselves when riding in a group they are placing too much trust in their fellow riders for their own good.
- GRAVELTATIONAL FORCE: The powerful force that seems to pull a rider directly toward a patch of gravel found in the middle of a blind curve. Conversely, some riders find that the graveltation effect actually pushes them and their motorcycles away from the gravel and toward the road’s edge or oncoming traffic.
- FENDER BLENDER: Following the car ahead of you so closely there’s no room left for adequate reaction times. But, by creating even a few bikes lengths of distance between you and the vehicle ahead, you create usable time, space and the ability to plan.
- FATAL EXTRACTION: Getting one’s self out of a dangerous situation just in time to avoid tragedy. Do all you can to stay out of trouble in the first place, because if you don’t you could just have an unpleasant “Auto Body Experience.”
- HEMORRHIDE: An extended ride with excessive time spent in the saddle without a break. Get off your bike, stretch your legs, get blood flowing and rehydrate—you may prefer to remain standing while doing this.
- PASSING ZZZZZZONE: Taking far too long to overtake another vehicle in a passing zone on a two-lane road. If a pass can’t safely be done in less than four seconds from start to finish without excessive speed, then perhaps it’s best just to hang back and pass on passing.
- SLOP SIGN: An intersection with a stop sign at which a rider or motorist rolls through without coming to a complete stop (or taking sufficient time to determine if the path through the junction is truly clear). I sometimes needs help with this one…
- ERECT-STYLE DYSFUNCTION: Riding a motorcycle with a flexed, vertical riding position with back stiff and arms outstretched and tense. Rigid riders with erect-style dysfunction should exhale slowly, lightly touch the bars, curve the elbows, and relax the back to allow the rider to roll body weight smoothly from hip to hip.
- A CHANGE-OF-HEART ATTACK: What an unsuspecting motorcyclist might have when the driver of another vehicle suddenly changes his or her mind and direction (would that make the driver a “Carmeleon?”).
Everyone, go out and have a wonderful summer. Fellow bikers, ride free and take risks, but keep the rubber side down!!